The Story Of My Life
by K-OfTheSouthernIsles
Summary: It's hard to give a description without revealing the story! But, lots of drama, fluff, anger, and a baby! (No slash!)
1. Forever And Always

"I'm here now." A hand lightly touched my sobbing shoulder. I look up from the my hands, that were holding my head, to the man who stood before me. I wanna speak to him, but I just couldn't. My words were trapped in my throat. Here stood my best friend, and I was speechless. He sits next to me, pulling me to his side, stroking my hair out of face. I have myself so wound up that my stomach felt tight and so did my throat.

"Tell me what's the matter." James coos. When I think of having to say what happened, I start crying all over again.

"Hey. Hey. Lighten up. And, go take one of these. You may be fretting over nothing." He hands over the pregnancy tests that I asked him for. Should the fact that he got them for me without a second thought reveal how amazing he is? I nod taking the bag from him. As I stand up, I look at his face, and in his eyes he seems worried. Man. I hate myself for making him look like that. I walk towards the bathroom, closing the door. I lean back against the door, sigh, then pick the cardboard box apart. I'm not even sure that I have to pee, but I unbutton my jeans and sit down anyways. The instructions fall out of the box, but how hard can it be to pee on a plastic stick? I tear the package containing the test open, stared at it for a little, and realized this is gonna change my life. .

I finish, then stand and flush the toilet. My pants get re-zipped, and I stand there for a minute looking at the test, but nothing happens. I go to open the door, and there James stands. All 6' 2" of him was right outside of my bathroom door. I set the test down on the vanity counter.

"So?" He asks.

"I don't know." I shrug my shoulders and walk away.

"You don't know? Either it was positive or negative. Did you wait 5 minutes?" He picks up the test and followed me.

"No."

"Well, that's the problem, Riley. Sit and tell me what happened. Why do you think you need a pregnancy test?" He sat on the couch. In no way did he make me feel pressured, but it's so easy to tell him everything. I sit next to him, but not right beside him.

"Long story or short?"

"Just tell me what I need to know."

"You know my birthday was a few weeks ago. Charles and everyone was celebrating with drinks, but you know my "No drinks, no drugs" policy. It would interfere with my nursing school. But, Charles had too many drinks," I put my hand over my mouth to block the cry that came, but I couldn't block the tears that came down my face, " And, he wouldn't stop. I asked him to, but he wouldn't." By this point, it was a battle to understand what I was saying through the hard sobbing. "But I've been feeling drug down lately. And, of course, since the night it happened, I've been scared of this. And, I was waiting for today. I was supposed to start my period today. But, I didn't." Fear was shaking my hands and words.

"I'll kill him." James states matter of factually.

"No. Please. I love him. He didn't mean to."

"Well," James tilts his head towards me, "Let's hope he loves you back. You are carrying his baby now."

"What?" I snatch the test away from his clutch, and examine the big, pink plus sign that is glaring at me. Moments pass while we sit in silence.

"Are you okay?"

"I don't know." I finally look away from the test.

"You are gonna be fine. I know. And, you're so lucky. You've got a miracle growing under your skin. Right here, " He smiles and touches my belly button area, "You've been chosen to mother a new life, who may go on to change the world. Please, don't be upset," He pulls me in a hug, "Everything will be okay."

"Thank you." I hug him back.

"Do you think you'll keep it?"

"I don't doubt it. I just can not imagine giving up something that I spent months making." For the first time in days, I chuckled genuinely. He laughs too.

"I believe you need to inform someone of their impending fatherhood."

"Yes!" My crying ceased to be replaced with smile. At this moment, I have no idea why I was freaking out earlier. I mean, I love Charles, Charles loves me. We can do this. We've even talked about having children, in theory much further in the future, but I think we'll be okay.

"He's at work! I'll go see him now! Wait, I don't have a car!"

"I'll take you, Mama Mia." I grab my phone and the test, cramming them in my purse. The ride to the mall is a nervous and overly excited one. I practice how I am going to tell Charles by using James.

"Come on! Come on!" As the car comes to a halt in front of the mall, I hop out. Everything is becoming a blur. I take off running for Ambercrombie & Fitch. As quickly as my feet will take me, and just as I turn to where the store is, he was walking out.

"Char!" I run toward him. He looks back at me and smiles with shock slightly on his face. His arms open and I hop up, wrapping my legs around his waist, he holds me, and I clash my lips with his.

"Oh! Someone having a good day?" Those blue eyes of his look back at me.

"Sort of! Are you on break?"

"Yes. I was about to go get a smoke."

"Well, okay." He lowers me down, then takes my hand. We make small talk, walk to the parking lot to his car, and he gets his cigarettes. He pulls one out, lights it, tosses the lighter back in the car, and takes his first huff.

"So, you gonna tell me what lead up to your fabulous entrance?" He exhales the smoke, leaving the cigarette between his middle and index finger. And, the smile that consumed my face made the muscles ache, but I didn't care.

"Wow. It must be good." He inhales another hit of the nicotine filled death trap between his fingers.

"Well, you're gonna have to stop doing that around me, for one thing." I swat my hand in front my face to fan the smoke away.

"Baby, you know that I'm trying. And, I've improved from what I used to do."

"But, don't you know that you're not supposed to smoke around pregnant women?"

"I know that, but that's not something that we're having to deal with now. That'll come later. I'll be completely done with smoking by then."

"What if we did have to deal with it now? Would you quit?"

"Of course, I would. But, we don't have to." He scratches at his hairline after another inhale of death.

"So, you wouldn't wanna be a dad soon?"

"I don't know. Why are you so determined to talk about this today?" His arm holds me closer to his chest, and he continues to puff his cigarette, unaware how truly mistaken he was.

"Wouldn't you want a baby?"

"In a few years, when we have more money, and you're out of school, and maybe married."

"But, just play along with me. What if we were to have a baby now? What would we do?"

"I don't know. You can't truly tell what would happen until it actually happens."

"Well, it actually is."

"What is, Baby?" He flicks the butt of the cigarette away, wraps both arms around me, then kisses the side of my face.

"We're going to have a baby." I hear him laugh.

"I gotta give it to you, you certainly are an expert level prankster."

"I'm not kidding though." I reach in my purse, and hand over the test. He looks at it, without taking it from my hand.

"You're pregnant?"

"With your baby." I nod. You can physically see him drain of all color and emotion. This is when the doubt starts to set back in. He isn't moving. Only looking to be biting the inside of his cheek.

"You're not keeping it, are you?" I feel like my heart is being torn from my chest.

"I- I don't understand."

"Are you getting an abortion or what?" I push away from him and gawk.

"Charles! Why would you say that? This is your child!"

"We're not ready for it! It will only struggle between two teen parents! What an unfair life!"

"Teen parents?! We're not 15! You'll be 20 in a few months, and I'll be 19! Unfair is not getting a chance to live!"

"So, what? You're gonna get fat and get stretch marks and permanent emotional damage so that you can give it away?"

"I wasn't planning on giving our baby away!"

"You were gonna keep it?!" His face scrunches in disbelief.

"Yes!"

"Why?!"

"Because, it's not the baby's fault that it was made! We made it! And, it deserves a chance."

"I'm not ready for a kid, and neither are you. I don't think we should keep it."

"You're not the one who's carrying our baby! I am! Why are you so against this?!"

"You know why. And, we are not ready. That's final." He states, then looks away, wiping the corners of his mouth, which is habit of his when he's frustrated. My eyes are welling with tears. This isn't fair. This isn't how it was supposed to be.

"I am not killing our baby."

"We can't keep it. And, I don't see you spending nine months being pregnant and then giving it away. You need to nip it in the bud."

"We could do it."

"You're working and going to school, and so am I, where do you plan on fitting being a parent? Between biology and chemistry, or on your 15 minute breaks? We're making a living, getting by now. We can not afford a baby. Where would we keep it? At your brother's? I don't think he'd want a squalling baby around all the time. And, we can not keep it at my house. My parent's would kill you and me both if they ever found out."

"Finance isn't the reason you don't want our baby. You're still scared of him! You're so scared of being him that you wanna keep putting off your life! But, you're already like him." I see the hurt and fury in Charles' face. He pushes past me.

"I'm keeping the baby, whether you like it or not!"

"Then, we're through." He yells back. We're through, the words echo. We're through.

The burning, breaking feeling tearing through my whole body brought me to my knees. The next phase of calling James back, him finding me, picking me up, putting me in his car, and taking me home are just a montage in brain with 'I Can't You Make You Love Me' (by Nina) playing. Going to bed, sobbing into my pillow along with screaming and more crying, and ruined make up is accompanied by 'No Me Queda Mas' (by Selena). **  
**

By the time that my brother, Logan, got home; I was long gone. But, James took it upon himself to warn Logan what was to wait for him. So, emotions, tempers, and patience was flaring.

~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~** End Of Chapter **_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~

_Thoughts? Questions? Concerns? Observations? Please, let me hear what you think. BTW: Each chapter will be the name of a song that will be relevant to a situation to the story: I'll tell you at the end in this part what the song and artist is, and maybe you can hear it and give me feed back! But, thank you, Dearies! I need reviews or I might not continue with this. It's 50/50. But, appreciate you all! Much love! Xoxo, K-OfTheSouternIsles._


	2. I Learned From You

"When did this happen? How long have I not known?" Logan voice floats down the hall.

"She just found out earlier today. I took her to see him, and then this." James' follows soon after.

I have regained conciseness with a pounding head and swollen eyes. From what I can see, my pillow has acquired my mascara and tears.

"And, she's absolutely sure?"

"Pretty sure. She took a test."

"He broke up with her?"

"She wasn't really clear with her words, but what I did translate was that he said that they are through. Kinda selfish, don't you think?" It sounded like maybe a glass cup was set down on the dining table.

"I don't condone his actions, but especially not both of theirs. Is she okay?"

"She fell asleep a while ago." James sighs. Logan groans.

They're debating over my choices and my situation like I am a child. Though I have full control of my facilities, I jump out of bed like a crazy lady, fly down to the dining room, and burst out with my opinion.

"I am not a kid! I am very aware of my actions and the consequences! If you all do not like them, then fine! I can make it on my own!" Before I can insert the next sentence, Logan is out of his seat giving me his input.

"No one said anything like that! Quit jumping to conclusions!"

"Don't yell at me!"

"You started it!"

"I had a bad day!"

"Not my fault that you got knocked up and your boyfriend isn't man enough to stick around!"

"You don't know anything! Shut up! You're such a hypocrite! Such a hypocrite! Don't you dare throw this up in my face!"

"Don't you dare bring her into this. I swear, you'll regret it." Logan scowls and almost bares his teeth.

"Shut up. Both of you." James steps between us, separating our seething figures. Logan shakes his head and steps back running a hand over his head. My hands grasp my upper arms and walk away too. "Now, act like the civilized adults that you are to calmly talk about this. There is already enough, and going to be more, tension around. She's your little sister. He's your big brother. You two were born to have to put up with each other's problems for life. So, stop yelling." James tries his best to relieve tension in the air, but everyone knows what a hardheaded person that Logan is; imagine him and I in an argument.

"She started it." Logan mumbles.

"I don't care. I'll end it. Now, apologize for being ugly to each other." James gives a warning look to both of us.

"I'm sorry for telling the truth." Logan snarls.

"I am not your parents! But, God help me! I am about to whip both of you." For a while, Logan and I have to make petty lashes and come backs. Not that James was pleased with that, he wanted us to say that we're sorry and hug it out. We'd get there, but we're both confused and we hurt each other, so it'll be a slow process.

Four hours and many arguments and insults later, we decided that it was alright to drop it. Sitting on opposite sides of the room, red faced, and sore throats from yelling occasionally; we definitely were done.

"I'm not mad at you. I'm just scared for you. It's not easy to be in your situation, I know, but what are you going to do? What are you going to do, Ri?"

"I'm gonna take some time to think through what's best," I get choked on my words, "I'll see what would be best for my baby. Whether it means that I'm part it their life or not." I hold my sides. It is now 4:30 in the morning.

"I'm sorry this has happened." I stand up, so does he, and we meet in a hug.

"I'm scared. What if I can't do this? What if I have to give up my baby?" He was supporting my weight.

"It'll be okay. It will. You are a strong, young lady. You will not crumble. You will hold your head high. Maybe, Charles just needs some time. It really came as a shock. Just give it time. Either way, you've got a pretty awesome brother and 3 supportive, extended brothers."

"How am I gonna tell mom and dad? They're gonna be so disappointed."

"You're their girl. Everything will be okay. Now, let's get some sleep. We'll continue in the morning." He loosen his hug, letting me go.

"Thank you." He ruffles my hair, ascending the steps to his room. Now, James and I stand in the living room.

"Thank you, James. For everything." I wipe the palm of my hands down my jeans.

"Of course."

"You can go home. It's okay."

"Or, since it's Christmas Eve now, I could stay and we can watch Christmas movies until we pass out. Because, frankly, I don't wanna drive."

"Alright." We grab pillows and blankets then pile in the living room. He takes the couch, and I go to the love seat. 'ELF' was our choice of movie, but we were out like lights within 30 minutes.

** ~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~ End of Chapter ~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_**

_Thoughts? Questions? Concerns? Observations? Let me know what you think! Chapter song: I Learned From You - Hannah Montana ft. Billy Ray Cyrus._

_ And, I'm sorry for not clarifying the last chapter's song. It was Forever And Always - Taylor Swift. _

_The title of the story is 'The Story Of My Life', once you've read the complete story, you'll understand. Yes, it is from the One Direction song. _

_Love you, Dearies. Xoxo, K-OfTheSouthernIsles_


	3. You Know I Will

_We're through. We're through. We're through. We're through. We're through. We're through._

The words pound in my skull. Echoing on and on. Despite the Christmas decorations that surround me, I donn't feel merry or bright. Christmas Eve morning, and I couldn't care less. If it weren't for the fear of ruining everyone else's holiday, I'd probably just lay on the couch all day.

"Hey, Baby Sis." Logan comes in with a cup of coffee. I just pull the blanket up and turn my face down to the pillow.

"Alright then." He tassels my hair, taking a seat on the recliner.

"Hey! Lookie! It's Little Riley!" The voice that happily fills the room makes me wanna sit up, but I don't. The lanky, pale boy sits on the coffee table in front of me. But, I don't bother to open my eyes.

"Logan told me how you're being antisocial, but come on. It's Christmas. You loooove Christmas."

"Ri. Come on. There's coco to make and treats to bake. Songs to sing." He pokes at my upper arm playfully. My eyes shift to James was sitting up, must've just woke up too because his eyes were still squinted.

"I wouldn't bother. She's not had a chance to wake up." Logan remarks. They both wait for me to do something. And, for shock's sake, I sit up. But, I don't say anything. I get off the couch, and go down the hall to get in Logan's bed.

"Alright. I tried." Kendall says. I shut the world out as much as possible. Not that I'm mad or anything, I just don't feel like entertaining . And, I really don't want to hear about what people thought I should do about my baby. I had only told James and Logan. I didn't realize that my hands were clutched until a slight pain was radiating from my palms. I release my grasp. And, somewhere among my overflowing thoughts, slept took me away.

**~PageBreak~PageBreak~PageBreak~ **

"Are you gonna pout forever or what?" My brother flops down on the bed beside me some hours later. My eyes shoot open, then shut just as hard.

"What?" I moan.

"I asked if you were gonna lay around and pout forever or what?" I narrow my eyes at him, and pull the cover over my head. But, he knew I could still hear him, so he continued on.

"It's okay to be hurt. I mean, you two were together for just under 3 years. He meant a lot to you, but if he broke up with you over a baby now; what would've stopped Charles from doing it later on? You gotta get up, and snap out of it. You're giving him the satisfaction of him having control over you. I know you well enough to know you're not that type of girl. Now, I got guests, but I wanted to make sure you were okay and to see if you wanted to join us." I remain still. The exasperated sigh that I've been hearing all too frequently lately sounded off again as he exited.

Does Charles have control over me like this? Am I moping because of him? I don't deserve to like this, I deserve to be happy. He's the one who left me, he's the one who should be crying. Not me. Logan's right, though I'll never tell him. I take a big gulp, pushing the covers off of me. The journey it took to get to the living room was rather difficult for me, seeing as I've not ate in a day or two, and I was so frightened. I come into the room, and stand against the wall behind the couch. It was James in the recliner that noticed I came in. He greeted me with a smile, not one to make it obvious to the others, but just for to see that he was glad I was out of bed.

I make my way over and sit on the lonesome love seat. The boys are playing an Xbox game, so I watch. Before long, Maslow was coming over to join me. He supplied the conversation, I mostly listened, but I slowly felt like I could be okay. Maybe get back to normal. I felt like I could be me again. Not now, but soon.

"Beat ya!" Logan whoops , followed by the boys tossing their controllers and groaning.

"Little excited, isn't he?" James asks me, shooting an eyebrow up.

"I don't think so." He causes a smile to spread on my lips. I felt eyes fall on us, so I look away from James. What must they think? I am not one to let other's opinions of me effect how I think of myself. Though, I know that James is only trying to comfort me, because we're good friends, but it feels as if the guys won't see it that way.

"So, what's everyone up to today?" I ask.

"Logan invited us over. We were gonna spend some time over here, then go home."

"Anyone hungry?" Logan tries to get a conversation going.

"If I was, I wouldn't eat anything you cooked. We wanna make it to Christmas!" Kendall gets the room in an uproar of laughter. Life is pretty alright for a while, we all talk, laugh, and I can feel some weight being lifted from my shoulders and heart. I guess, even though I couldn't stand my brother most times, he really knows me better than I know myself.

After shedding the victim feeling, I felt relieved. Even finding the nerve the take on Carlos in fighting over the remote. As I try to reach for it, he holds it higher. In the end, it didn't matter; all that was on was Christmas specials. We allow the TV to play in the background while indulging in a few board games. After Kendall and Logan feel the need to start a whip cream war, I opt for the marshmallows, and Carlos and James seem to think that the Mentos and Coke-Cola bombs topped everything perfectly. They were all even good sports in helping to clean up. (Let me tell you, cleaning up that mixture of food is no fun.) We all know that all good things must come to an end, and soon the guys were having to go their separate ways. That means that Logan and I have to head over to our parent's within the next few minutes. All we need is to change to a pair of PJs and we're set.

"Riley. Come on. Let's get a move on. Mom's already called three times. I'm going out to the car."

"I'm coming." I bound out of my room and to the car in two minutes. He puts the car in gear, pulling out of his driveway while I text Mom that we were on our way. Lo's iPod was already playing some MKTO.

"How do I tell them?"

"Hmm?" He glances over, seeing that I was looking at my stomach with a hand lightly against it.

"I think I'll wait until after the holiday. Don't wanna start any drama. I just want to have a good time. Not think about Charles. Just be happy."

"I think that's best too. But, you know, you're gonna have to tell them eventually. You're gonna need Mama's help."

"I know." I reach over to turn the music up, signalling that I was done talking about it. My stomach beings to turn knots again. Though Logan explained that they will not magically know that I with child. Regardless, I was scared that somehow I would start to 'show' or something.

"Wait! Am I showing?!" I frantically press my shirt against my abdomen, examining the effected area.

"What are you talking about?"

"Am I fat?! Do I look like it?!"

"You need to stop." He laughs, gripping the steering wheel for support. But, I don't find much humor in this. I suck in as much as I could. After finally deciding that I couldn't keep up that facade all night, I zip my jacket up just in case I might appear puffy. Have to be safe, right?

My phone pings with a text.

**Mazzy**: _How's it going? _

I unlock my screen and type out a quick reply.

**Me: **_Not there yet. Fill you in later._

**Mazzy:** _Alright._

My hands twitch nervously in my lap for the rest of the trip. And, it only got worse as we left the car and proceeded to the door.

"Logan! Riley!" Our youngest sister, Presley, greets us on the porch with a welcoming hug. Squeezing us tightly together.

"Oh! Heey." I pat her back, and Logan squeezes her in a hug too. We release our hug and quickly go into the warm house. Then our parents hug and greet us too. Gingerbread and coffee scents fill the house, and I can't decide if I was it was sickening or if I want to indulge. For safety sake, I just tell Mama that I already ate and would have some in the morning. I sit next to daddy, while Logan sits with Mom and Pres. I admire the beautifully packaged presents, Logan and I brought ours a few days ago so we wouldn't have to lug them around, and they fit with the many that our parents had there.

Sleepily, I lay my head on Daddy's shoulder, but I keep my hands folded across my chest. With the nice environment, warm atmosphere, and eyes already closing; I allow myself to succumb to sleep. In these last moments of consciousness, I couldn't feel any safer anywhere else in the world.

Unfortunately, like earlier, all good things come to an end. Shortly after my slip into blackness, the doorbell rings; startling me awake. I find that now I am now laying out of the couch with a blanket covering me, Presley and Mama watching TV, while Dad and Logan talk from the kitchen. I don't feel so well. My throat slightly tight and my stomach too.

"Oh! Sounds like family is here!" My eager family rushes to open the door, opening the door. I pat around for my phone, but I can not find it. I check my bra, pockets, and couch cushions. Oh My. What if my parents found it? What if they saw my texts? Did they see? Do they know?

"Looking for this?" Logan tosses my phone to me as he walks by.

"Oh, thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Did anybody-?"

"No. Just a few messages from James."

"Okay." I nod. He proceeds to the door to greet our Aunt, Uncle, and little cousins. Before I do, I check in with James.

**Mazzy: **_I hope everything goes okay._

**Mazzy:** _Are you gonna tell them tonight?_

I bite the inside of my cheek as I type my reply.

**Me: **_I don't think I'm gonna tell them tonight. I don't think they're ready._

"What are you not gonna us? Huh?" My bratty 12 year old cousin snatches my phone from my hand, waving it out of my reach. Fear and anger drench me as I rise too quickly, making my ailments worse.

"Give my phone back, please." I hold my hand out.

"Ouh. Who's Mazzy?"Her fingers flick to go through the messages and I jump over the couch to grab my phone, but she runs towards the group of people. I continue to reach for her, feeling worse and worse.

The family laughs, thinking that we're just playing around, but Logan's face read everything that I was feeling.

"Give it to me, Lori!" I demand, stopping in my tracks. She stops too, but the brat thinks she's such a smart person and reads my texts. Logan walks up behind her and takes it away from her.

"Hey!" She gets upset.

"It's not nice to take things that don't belong to you." He approaches me. I hear my heart beating in my ears, feel my hands shake, and acid burns my throat. It take my phone back, and hold it securely to my chest.

"What's the big secret?! Hm?! What are you hiding from us?!" She purposely makes a scene.

"It's none of your business." Logan speaks for me, seeing that I'm having trouble using my words.

"So there is a secret!"

"It's none of your business, Lorraine." The family was staring at this point. She wouldn't drop it, continuously pestering and chomping at the bits like a Chihuahua.

"Dear, just tell her so she'll let it go." Mama gently suggests.

"Because, it's none of her business."

"You've got a secret!"

"Whatever it is, I'm sure it's not worth whatever this is causing." Aunt Milly persists, but knowing her, she just wants to know too.

"It's none of any of your business, if I wanted you to know, I'd tell you."

"Riley Grace! Apologize now." Mom and Dad scold in sync.

"I didn't do anything!"

"What's the big deal! What's the big secret!" I turn to Logan for help, but he looked like he was drowning between the two sides.

"Well, out with it." Uncle Bill acts as if he has control of the situation.

"Go ahead, Ri." Logan nods.

"Mom, Dad. Will you please come with me to the kitchen." Tears fill my eyes. Either from fear, anger, or anticipation. I walk ahead and they follow. I build my courage, and instead of waiting around, I just out with it.

"Charles broke up with me because I'm pregnant." I say before I even turn to face them.

"What?" Dad gasps.

"What do you mean?" Mom questions.

"I'm pregnant, Mom. I'm going to have a baby."

"Oh." She says. I turn around to face them. But, dad is gone.

"Oh? Is that all you've got to say? Oh?"

"What do you want me to say? Congratulations? Oh, I'm so happy I have a teenage pregnant daughter, it's all I ever wanted? What do you expect? I don't know how to respond to it!"

"Merry Christmas, Mom." I walk away in to the living room, Dad is red faced and everyone else is blank. I slide my shoes and jacket on then leave, already dialing James' number.

_"Hello?" _His voice sounds thick with sleep.

"Will you please come pick me up?" I stand on my porch. Crisp, winter wind cutting through me. I hear a heated debate between the family starting.

_"Of course. You know I will. Give me ten minutes."_

"Thank you." Without asking a single question, he's on his way. I slide my phone back in my pocket.

"Grow up!" Logan opens the door, yelling back at the family. I look back and he shuts the door.

"Come back in." He look at me, as if I were to question him he'd throw me over his shoulder.

"I'm going with James." He just shakes his head in disbelief.

"They are so hilariously stupid."

"I'm sorry I ruined Christmas."

"You didn't. It's not. We've just gotta tell them what happened. They'll understand."

"Maybe."

"Just give it time." He tries to pep talk to me until James gets here.

"Love you, Logan. Merry Christmas." James stops in front of the house. I hug my brother and run to his car.

"Merry Christmas, Riley. I'll call you in the morning."

"Alright." I wave and get into the car. After strapping my seat belt on, I sit back, laying my head on the headrest. I feel the car start to go in motion. I slightly crack the window since the heat blowing on me was making me feel sick.

"So, it didn't go well?"

"Nope."

"I'm sorry. I am."

"Don't be. I don't need them. I don't need anyone."

"Except me. You always need me to assist you." I actually smile, and look over at him.

"Yes, I need you. You're my best friend."

_**~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_**_** End Of Chapter ****~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~**

_Thoughts? Questions? Concerns? Observations? Constructive criticism? Thought for me to keep in mind while writing? I want to hear everything. Let me know even your tiniest thought. _

_Song of the Chapter: You Know I Will - Lucas Grabeel._


	4. Human

_"Yes, I need you. You're my best friend."_

"Oh. Is that so?" I didn't even have to look at him to see the crooked smile. Despite how my blood relatives made me feel, he was making it better. I couldn't just forget about it, but close enough. He's great like that. Here, I entered the car broken and mad, within seconds he has me grinning.

"Shut up." I fidget with my fingers to distract me.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" He prompts.

"I can't say that I was shocked. I knew this would happen. I wish it hadn't. They called the baby 'It'. My own mother did. My dad couldn't look at me. And, Logan started yelling and then I called you. I ruined Christmas. But, they over-reacted! I didn't want to tell them tonight, but my annoying little cousin took my phone and read our texts. So, I had to explain."

"I see."

"She's such a snitch. I never liked her. I'm so mad that I literally feel sick at my stomach. I could just punch her brace face."

"I think that would hurt you worse than it would hurt her."

"I'd would take the pain. I'd save her family the money of having to remove those wires. I'd rip them and her teeth out."

"She sounds wicked. Also, remind me to never make you mad."

"Charles still hasn't even contacted me. I'm not sure what to do. My boyfriend left me, my family disowned me; over a baby. A baby. They're not all that bad. It's just - just a baby. They're small and cute. Sure they smell and cry, but everyone says it's worth it. It's not like I've even said anything about keeping him or her. I'm just pregnant. This didn't have to be this way though," I lean my head back, "Maybe, Charles was right. Maybe, I can not do this. Perhaps an abortion would be best for everyone."

James slams the brake pedal to the floor, throwing us both forward.

"Are you serious?" He looks at me shocked and I look at him embarrassed.

"I-." Stuttering is all that I can manage.

"Since when is listening to Charles a good idea?! He's a moron; a weak little boy who is too scared to be a man. And, you're gonna choose to kill someone innocent because a few people had a bad reaction? Riley, please, tell me you're not serious."

"I was just mad. It just came out. I didn't mean it."

"You don't need to listen to anybody. The only thing you need to listen to is you. Do what you know is right and good. Your heart. What does your heart say?"

"I'm not sure even my heart knows what it's supposed to do."

"It does. You always do what's right."

"I'm only human. I get weak, I cry, and I lose myself. I'm wrong sometimes. Obviously."

"Those things will lead to you being strong. The best part of losing yourself is finding out how much better you can be. Trust me, you can do anything if you will it. I believe in you."

"A terrible decision really. I don't even believe in myself anymore. I let everyone down. It's horrible feeling. I don't recommend it. I just wish there was an 'Easy' button. I could have Charles back and the holiday wouldn't be mush."

"You've not let me down. Lighten up. But, here's one thing. You don't need Charles. He's an idiot that didn't realize the opportunity that he had. You are a strong and independent young lady. You don't _need_ anyone but yourself. You can do whatever your mind is set to." The car continues in motion. I bite the inside of my cheek as I wish I could be the person he thinks I am. I even like the way he described 'me'. He may have just been trying to make me feel better.

"I'm sure that you've passed my house long ago."

"I'm not taking you home."

"What? Why not? Where are we going?"

"My house. I wasn't gonna make you spend Christmas alone. Sleeping in the same house two nights in a row. What will they think?" James nudges my arm with his elbow.

"Oh, the scandal." I roll my eyes playfully.

"Yes. We will be all over the tabloids. Barbra Walters will want an exclusive. TMZ will have cameras everywhere."

"You need help." I shove his arm. It's just so frustrating that I'm in a bad mood, but he's just cracking jokes and making light of it. I guess he, like everyone else I know, doesn't know how to respond to the situation. It's not like I'm diseased or something, it's just a baby. It can't be that bad right? Lots of people have babies, every day. Just because I am young, and now single, is there something wrong with me or my baby? Will I be able to do this? What if it's for the best that I find someone who needs a baby, someone who can't have one.

"Are you coming in?" James asks before opening his door.

"Yeah." I get out of the car and walk up the path way, he's unlocking the front door. James begins to sweet talk Fox, who is excited to see his dad home. A warm breeze whips against me as I step in the slightly messy house. It's now my turn for Fox to jump at my knees and spin around. I crouch down petting him.

"You can take any bed you want. Or the couch. Kitchen's full of food. Make yourself at home."

"Thank you." I slip my jacket off, hanging it up.

"Are you tired?"

"Kind of. And, hey. I'm sorry. For waking you up. I just needed to get out of there."

"No need for that. I'm glad that I could help." His eyes are screaming for sleep.

"I think I'll sleep here," I pat the couch, "You need to get to bed." I am a couch bum, I know this.

"You sure? Can I get you anything?"

"No, James. Go to sleep."

"Yes, Mama." He rolls his eyes and smiles. As he ascends the stairs, I take a seat on the couch. I lay down and curl up. I'm not really cold, so I don't need a blanket.

I have to conscientiously keep my hands off my belly area. I don't want to get too attached if I'm gonna have to give her or him away. Every time I say or think that, this terrible feeling overwhelms my stomach. Pain and sickness. Like the tiny forming human in me knows what I'm saying, and then I feel guilty. My fingers twirl briefly in my hair before my thoughts take me away to sleep.

**_*Next Morning*_**

"Hmm." I stretch. Magically, I now have a blanket. Thanks, James. I don't believe he's awake yet, so I remain still.

In the silence, my mind reels back to my family and Charles; wondering if they even miss me. My phone doesn't have any missed calls or unseen texts, so I set it back down.

"Hey, Fox." He little Alaskan Klee Klai jumps up on the couch and lays next to my chest. I scratch behind his ears.

"You don't hate me do you?" His tail wag lifted my spirits.

"Thanks, Boy." He lays still next to me as I pet his head. I listen to music through my ear buds from my phone and play Temple Run. I have to skip a few songs to avoid crying, then I have to switch to my Dance playlist. I don't rock out, but I do avoid tears, and that's all I care about. If I cry anymore, my face will chap.

_Dance, Dance _(Fall Out Boy) seems to my favorite. I feel like I should be listening to Christmas music, but I know that I should be singing them with my family, so they upset me.

I look down at my belly. Not to see a bump or anything, but to think that underneath there, I was growing a baby. A tiny person's whole being was based on me.

An hour or so passes, I drift back to sleep shortly, but awake when Fox barks in his sleep. Then, I browse Pintrest. I'd get up, but that involves moving and using energy. I really need to pee though, so I move around Fox to stand on the cool wood floor. I bob my head a little to _Hold It Against Me _(Britney Spears) as I walk down the hall. I push the bathroom door open to be greeted by steam brushing my face, and when the mist died down, James was standing in his towel.

_Wanna know just how you feel._

_If I said my heart was beating loud, if we could escape the world somehow,_

_If I said I want your body now, would you hold it against me?_

My eyes glaze over his body. He looks over, as if waiting for me to say something. All I can focus on is his glistening body. I bite my lip, and shut the door.

"Holy Cannoli." I whisper to myself. I pull my ear buds out. They fall to the floor with a clink. Dear Lord. Probably going back down stairs would be best. Other wise, I'd open the door for another peak. It wouldn't hurt would it? Agh. I shake my head and go down stairs; going to the kitchen for a cool drink.

I grabbed a water bottle from the fridge and take a lasting gulp.

"Morning." James appears behind me. Now, wearing just some jeans, his hair still damp, and when he reached by me for a cup, heat radiated from his skin. He warms fill the cup with water then places it in the microwave.

"Good morning."

"And, Merry Christmas."

"I'd tell you the same, but you don't celebrate Christmas." He laughs as he removes the cup from its heating facility and places it on the counter, then puts in a tea bag.

"Thank you. It would have meant a lot." He winks. My eyes try to stay averted, but they can't, so I pretend to look out the window.

"How'd you sleep?" He asks.

"Just fine. You?"

"Same." The aroma of the green tea is filling the air. It isn't really pleasing but I am not gonna hurl. After relocating to the living room; we eat Cheerios, watch the Disney parade, and play on our phones.

"Can I ask you something and it not be weird?" He asks.

"I guess."

"Do you think that you're more than 4 weeks?"

"You mean-?"

"Yes."

"I think so."

"Well," He smiles, "Your baby has a heartbeat." He smiles at me. Is he really reading up about pregnancy? How awkwardly sweet. A good best friend, right?

We are both disturbed when there is a knock at the door. He sets his cup down and gets up. Then, a relaxed sigh is heard.

"Just your brother." I smile and get up. I see him. He walks in and we catch each other in a hug.

"Merry Christmas, Bug."

"Merry Christmas, Brubber."

**_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~ End Of Chapter _~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~__**

_Comments? Questions? Concerns? Thoughts? Observations? Constructive criticism? _

_As you can tell, Riley is having mix emotions about the baby. And, about James. You think he feels the same or is he just being friendly? But, what about Charles? What about her friends and parents?_

_Chapter Song: Human - Christina Perri_


	5. Good Bye

*Riley POV*

Days come and go. Slow and dreary, but life goes on. It's a lesson that needs to be taught early in life. Life keeps going whether you're ready or not. Some people can take it; some can not. For those of us who wake up every day, get out of bed, and put a smile on our faces; congratulations. You have done it. You have made it. Like me, you've found reason to continue on. Whether or not you're sure of that reason is unclear, but there is one there.

Morning sickness has developed, but not terribly. I usually just hate strong smells, the food I can stomach lately is Cheerios.

Today is the day, for the first time since finding out that I expecting, that I return to work. It's December 27th, and it sucks for two reasons. I don't feel like going today and I will most likely be seeing Charles. We don't work in the same store, I work in Victoria's Secret actually, they 2 stores away from each other. I could 'accidentally' see him, but do I want to? Will it hurt too much? What if he saw me and was to apologize for what he said?

Don't even go there. If I go down that road, I will only be disappointed.

I glance at my wrist watch; 15 minutes until work begins. Songs play to me through ear buds from my phone, trying to pep me for the long day that lay before me. As I walk, I also try to prepare myself for passing his store. Should I look in or just walk by? My heart actually pounds because of all the nervous , undecided energy.

Here we go. I stand in front of the store, looking in the glass, pretending to ruffle my hair in the reflection. In reality, I am looking for him.

There. There he is. I smile a little. He is laughing with a male co-worker, he has a great smile. Char and Eric are hanging new shirts out and making it look like more fun than Disney World. To run in and hug him would be absolutely amazing, like I used to. I shuffle my foot towards the entrance then stop.

No. Don't do this. Do not make a fool out of yourself.

When he looks my direction, I freeze. His smile dwindles off his face, eyes dart down quickly and back up to mine, then turns away. My soul, stomach, and heart drop simultaneously.

Like, I told myself; don't expect anything.

"Riley!" That would be Liz, she's my co-worker; originally from New Jersey. In her hand, some pizza from the food court; it usually is our favorite, but I really don't want to smell the greasy, hot pepperoni.

"Come on. I need to clock in." I motion her to follow, but I walk a few feet ahead of her, so as to not smell it. We quickly greet and jump into conversation as we walk to back of the store so that I can clock in.

"So, rumor has it," Liz gives a nervous giggle, and my breathing stops,"You and Charles broke up? Eric said that he got a call from Char, saying that he wanted to go out and get drunk. Of course, he accepted, but he asked why. Char told him that the only cure for a broken heart is vodka and loud music. I didn't wanna ask you in case it wasn't about you, and if it was I didn't wanna rub it in. So, tell me, Sweetheart." She isn't one to carry gossip, that is what bothers me so much about this conversation. What did he say that would have my sweet Elizabeth spreading the word?

"Yeah. It's true."

"Oh! No! No, no! Are you alright? Oh, why didn't you call me? What happened?"

"We had a fight."

"Over what?"

"I'm not ready to talk about it."

"Oh, of course. Whenever you're ready, I'm here."

"Thank you." I fake a smile. She nods and walks over to help a customer.

When will I be ready? Will I ever be ready to tell ... well... anyone? I know that I can't hide him or her for long, but why should I hide? It will only get worse. I will be more ridiculed.

What do I do? What do I do? I'll wait until after the new year. I can prepare mentally and emotionally.

Work drags. I keep my eyes mostly glued to the entrance, hoping to see him. I get to, twice, but my heart broke a little more each time. Liz gives me condoling looks, sweet words, and warm hugs, but it's not the looks, words, and hugs that I want. I want him. I want him to want me. I want him to want our baby. He doesn't even have to do that, I could just have the baby and then we find a family for her or him.

"Riles, are you crying?" I jump to wipe my face. Her gaze follows mine to the small group of people cutting up and causing ruckus on the bench area. It's the central hang out area for workers on break. Charles and his friends are being overly loud and rowdy, almost seems to be purposefully catch my attention.

It does hurt to see that he's okay, but he did tell Eric that he was heartbroken. It is his own fault though. He is the one who walked away from me. Maybe, it could be my fault. I didn't stop him. Should I have said something? Was bringing his step dad up the wrong approach? I could have been more sensitive. If that subject could have been avoided, perhaps we might still be together. I screwed it up. I don't even know what gender our baby is and I've already screwed up as being a mom. I can't believe I've already messed up someone's life, someone who isn't even born.

What if I tried to talk to him? His mind might change still yet. I could apologize for what I said and he could too, then we discuss what to do. We may even get to keep the baby together. That would be great. I can help him understand that just because he grew up with a bad replacement dad doesn't mean that he will be one. Charles would probably be an amazing father; he is so great with his little half-sister.

"Elizabeth? Can I take my break early?"

"Sure thing."

"I'll be back shortly." I set the price gun down and walk towards the roaring gathering. We all are friends, so just act natural. I have a right to hang with them too.

"Hey." I sheepishly bud in. A few high fives are slapped and even Alysia hugs me from behind. Unfortunately, their greetings don't mean a thing without his, but I can be the bigger person.

"Hey, Char." He acknowledges me with a nod without looking away from his phone.

"Can we talk privately?" I ask and can tell he really doesn't want to, but he knows not to underestimate my ability to throw a tantrum and expose the reason of our break up.

"Let's go grab something to eat." He stretches after standing up and starts walking. That used to be our code for sneaking off to make out, but as we walk a few feet a apart, I doubt he even wants to breath the same air as me. The tension between us was like a flashing neon sign.

"What do you wanna talk about?" He leans against the wall after we're out of sight.

"Us. We're not really over are we?"

"Did you take care of the problem?"

"What problem?"

"Don't play dumb with me."

"I haven't got an abortion, no."

"There's no 'us', with that."

"I've thought about what we can do. We could find a family that needs a baby, Charles." He turns his head away, but I use my hand to softly turn him back to me.

"I can't be with you if you keep it alive."

"We don't have to keep the baby. We'll give him or her their best chance."

"You don't understand. I don't have anywhere else to live, if my parents find out, I'm toast. I will be dead."

"So, when they see me pregnant, what are you going to tell them? What are you going to tell all your friends?"

"I was hoping that you would eliminate it before that."

"Please. You won't be like him. You can do so much better. If not for this one, if we decide that it's best for him or her to be with someone else, then for the next one we could have."

"I won't be with you if you don't get rid of it now."

"Please, Charles. I'm begging you. I don't want to kill our baby. I won't." He wraps his fingers around my wrist, pulling my hand from his face.

"Then, I don't want to be with you."

"No. No. Don't do this." He drops my hand and stands up right. I take in his blue eyes and touch his blonde hair, feeling as if it would be the last time.

"Do the right thing and we can be together."

"I am doing the right thing." He sighs, standing straight, and presses his lips to my forehead.

"Goodbye, Riley." His hands slide down my arms.

For the second time, I watch him walk away from me. For the second time, my heart breaks, but for the first time I don't cry.

_Goodbye._

I don't see him for the rest of the day, I don't want to. I just want to go home and go to bed. Logan won't be home; I'll be by myself.

I turn the key and push the door open. Climbing the stairs is more work than I want to exert. I think it may be due to having to face all of the Charles and Riley memorabilia in my room.

I pull up the 'Charles' playlist on my phone, I'll only listen to it one last time. The empty shoe box finally has a purpose, I begin to remove the pictures of us from the wall, taking time to examine each one.

_The fair, our first summer together._

_Our friend's birthday beach trip._

_A couple of just our hands holding or just us kissing. _

_Christmas._

_Halloween._

_Logan and Him wrestling in Mom's yard. _

_Picnics._

_Cuddling on the couch._

I touch my lips with my fingertips; I can still feel his kiss there. The final picture I have in my hands is one of just us sitting on the beach, side by side, holding hands. My head lay on his shoulder, his head on mine.

"I'm so sorry, Little One. I can't do this on my own," I hold the picture to my chest and tears stream down my face, "I have to find you a family. I'm so sorry. I won't be able to give you everything you will need, but I will give you chance to get it. I promise." I slide the picture down my abdomen.

"I will my best to give you the best that I can." My body curls into a ball over my bed.

"I love you so much. I'm sorry." I repeatedly chant.

_**~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~ End of Chapter ~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~ **_

_Thoughts? Questions? Observations? Comments? Concerns? Constructive criticism? _

_Chapter Song: Good-Bye - Miley Cyrus. (Obviously not the whole song. Just the first two verses. Unfortunately, Charles has not yet decided that he made a mistake and wants to apologize.)_

_P.S.: I thought that since I listened to Torn by Miley Cyrus a few times while writing this, I'd include it in this part. _


	6. I Wish I Could Break Your Heart

*Riley POV*

All the pictures are off the wall, the stuffed animals are in a box down the hall, but still his presence is here. Lingering under my skin. I'm just going to have to get used to that. I'm now sitting on the floor with my back pressed against the foot board. Demons pound my head and guilt pumps in my heart like the blood. The longer I sit, the more anger consumes my soul. Song lyrics of disappointment, rage, and revenge race in my mind. My hand slip into my hair and pulls slightly.

Why can't he just understand? I love him, but I do not have to same belief that he does about our situation. I gave a very acceptable solution, all he had to do was accept it. So what if his parents kicked him out? He could live with me and my brother until we could get our own place.

But, maybe, that's just it. Maybe having this baby together would forever tether him to me, and maybe he didn't want to just tied down just yet. That's fully understandable.

This is all his fault though!

I'm not the one who should be like this. He's the one who should be in pain and angry. I need to be the one who is laughing and having a good time. I'll show him tomorrow. He'll see.

I clutch the pillow to my chest; fingertips turning white from the pressure. I wish I could hurt him the way he hurt me. If only I could make him feel the way I do. I never want to hurt him, but just to make him go through what I am.

No. He'll see tonight. I don't need him and I'll show him.

I'll send a text to Erica she'll spread the word.

**Me**: _Girls night? And, boys night? Let's get together and go out. Send to everyone you want to come! The beach, by our pier, in an hour?_

**Erica: **_U got it gurl! C u there!_

**Me: **_See ya!_

This is the night, tonight, I will unleash the part of me that nobody ever gets to see. I go to my dresser; a teal crop top, white pants, black flip flops. Perfect. Hair; partial. Oh, and the little flower crown headband will be perfect. Make-up, just enough to barely tell it is there.

Oh yes. This is most definitely going to be a night to remember. I'm going to drive myself, no need to depend on anyone else.

As I go to grab my purse and to the front door, it opens.

"Logan." I step back.

"Oh, sorry. You going somewhere?" He raises an eyebrow.

"Uh, yes. Out with a few friends. See you later."

"Okay. Hey." He calls my attention back.

"Yes?" I step out the door and turn back around.

"Don't do anything stupid. You could get pregnant or something out there." I hit with my purse before he can defend himself, then I run and hop in the car. I used only 30 minutes getting ready, so I have all the time I need to get there, but I rush anyways.

A few people are already here, building a fire, and music booming from a stereo. So far a great turn out, 7+ people. My eyes squint to see Jesse, Chad, Arielle, Thomas, Lara, Liam, Claire, Erica and Eric (Twins!), and uh. Who's that on the the other side of the fire? A couple apparently. Sitting on the other's lap. A closer look would help. I step forward.

What?

It can not be.

No way.

I gather my strength and close in on the group. With a smile, I bounce over to the beat of the song.

That little slut.

There sits Charles with another girl on his lap, his hand gently tracing up and down her arm, and she is not even paying attention to him. She's too busy running her mouth to the group of girls by her, who all have bottled beverages. It doesn't matter, he's talking to the herd of boys on his side of the chair.

The music needs to be louder. I nod at Liam to do as so. People start to come alive. But, I simply could not be without a date.

**Me:** _You busy?_

**Mazzy: **_Not at all._

**Me: **_Great. Wanna join a party on the beach? I kinda need your assistance._

**Mazzy: **_Yes!_

**Me:**_ Wonderful! You know where to come. I'll be waiting._

**Mazzy:**_ What's the assistance that you need?_

**Me:** _Charles brought another girl._

**Mazzy: **_No. No. I will be there in 20. _

I grab Alysia's hand and twirl around playing to the music. Erica joins us.

Our playlist includes:

1) The Other Side - Jason Derulo

2) Classic - MKTO

3) Bad Romance - Lady Gaga

4) Since U Been Gone - Kelly Clarkson

5) Monster - Lady Gaga

6) C'mon - Ke$ha.

True to his word, he is here, and just like the amazing friend he is; he shows up making a spectacle.

He comes up behind me, grabbing my hand, spinning me around.

"C'mon! C'mon! C'mon!" We sing at each other. Putting all the group, that was participating, you might think that there was an actual rave going on. Occasionally, I will look to see if Charles is watching, and he is. With a glare that would scare me any other time, but not now.

James is perfect though. We dance, laugh, and make fools out ourselves. Other girls make fools out of themselves by flirting with James. Eventually, I have to take a break, feeling sick to my stomach. We sit off aside from the group.

"She's not even that pretty." James remarks.

"Right? I look so much better than her."

"Oh. Like, 10 million trillion times better than her." We laugh.

"Hey. I left my phone in the car, let me go check it." He leaves me there. The crashing waves, the warmth of the fire, and the bass of the music just seem to make everything else drift away. I thought he had returned when someone was standing above me.

"What? Not afraid that you might 'show' in your skimpy outfit?" He jerks me up by the arm and turns me around.

"Afraid people will find out that you're a no count slob?" I place my hand over my mouth, feigning shock on my face. He just laughs and releases me.

"You're the one who will branded a slut."

"And, you're gonna be the one who will be looked at the disappointment. The one who left me for not wanting to kill a baby. Pick your poison." I hiss.

"Well, look who got a backbone. Your little boyfriend know you're pregnant? Or does he think it's his? Because, that could be plaus-."

"Excuse me. Is there something going on over here?" James returns shoving his phone in his back pocket.

"None of your business." Charles snarly replies.

"This girl is all of my business." James places an arm around my shoulders.

"I get it now! You're her pimp. Suddenly, it's all clear. "

"I am wanting to recruit new business," James pats his pockets," Oh. Darn. I must've forgot my card at home. You would be perfect the job though. The reviews I've heard about you are fantastic! You can just get someone pregnant and leave. Wow. Round of applause to you." James claps while I bust out laughing at fact that James just called Charles a perfect hooker.

"You're psychotic." I looks at me as if I'm just filth.

"You are completely correct. I do not disagree. There is no other explanation for why I dated you." I snark. James and I slap high fives as Charles walks away from us.

"That was amazing!"

"What can I say? No one messes with my girl."

"Thank you. I don't know if I could say any of that without you here."

"You know I will always have your back."

"And, I always will have yours." I half smile.

"We just told off your ex, and you look like your foot got ran over." He places a single hand on my shoulder. I shrug.

"I just thought that this would make me feel better, but it hasn't."

"You thought trying to show him up would make you feel better? Ri, that's nonsense. The best revenge you can get on someone is to forget about them. And, one more thing, if you get the chance to hurt someone that hurt you, and you take it, you're not really over them."

"How am I supposed to get over him! I'm gonna have his baby!" First, his eyes shoot wide, then mine do as I realize what I've done.

Gasp after gasp fills the chilled night air. Sadly though, I do not feel the chill because my face is burning red. What have I done? Did I just really just do that? James sees the panic in my eyes.

_"You've got to be kidding me."_

_"No way! Of all people, her?_

_"I did not see that coming."_

_"That's so shocking."_ The crowd murmurs.

"Well, obviously. That's why I broke up with her. She cheated on me." Charles inserts. Another gasp from the crowd. Both my and James' jaws dropped.

"You liar!" I yell and approach him.

"Who's the one who kept it a secret?"

"I found out the same day as you! Don't you dare stand there and deny that this baby isn't yours! This is why you broke up with me!"

"I'm not gonna do anything. I'm gonna leave you deal with the mess you've stepped into." He shrugs and walks away, leaving all eyes on me. My breathing begins to shallow and my hands tremble.

"_Wow. Is she gonna hurl?"_

_"Better step back." _Firelight reflective eyes all point at me.

"Let's go." James takes my hand, dragging me to his car. An uproar of conversation around the fire begins. I get into the car, not even caring that I am leaving mine. We'll get it after everyone leaves. The Audi tears out of parking spot and going as fast as it will go.

"Well, I guess that's that." I come out of my shock-like state.

"I guess it is. You told Charles off and told your friends all in one sitting. Or, well, standing. Whatever."

"They think I'm a whore. Charles told them I cheated."

"But, they also heard what you had to say. So, they might not believe him."

"They will though."

"You'll see; everything will be alright."

"Just take me home, please."

_**~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~End Of Chapter ~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~**_

_Thoughts? Comments? Concerns? Observations? Constructive criticism? _

_Chapter Song: I Wish I Could Break Your Heart - Cassadee Pope_


	7. Don't Laugh At Me

*Riley POV*

"And, then I just blurted it out! Right in front of everyone. We are so officially over. I hope to never see that creep ever again. I'm gonna have such a better life without him. I will be free. I'll see other guys. I won't be tamed." I stand in Logan's kitchen, ranting about my night as I eat on an apple.

"Sounds like you should have broke up with him a lot sooner. Well, sooner than he could have got you pregnant. How do you plan to be free and tame-less with a baby?"

"I actually was thinking about finding the baby a family."

"Like?"

"Yeah. I don't think that I properly give the care he or she needs. Plenty of couples want a baby but can not have one. It will be the best chance. With two parents."

"That seems very honorable of you. Very considering."

"I guess." Here comes that tight feeling in my stomach again. The one associated with talking about giving him/her away. I hope that goes away.

"What if it's twins?" He points his ice cream spoon at me.

"Don't even joke about that." I slap my palm to my forehead, then dig my spoon in his frozen treat.

"Uh, excuse you."

"I'm with child. I need nourishment."

"Oooohhh. Then get a banana or peach or some grapes."

"I want your ice cream though." I smile and take another bite.

"First to get a brain freeze wins?" He raises an eyebrow to interest me.

"Not tonight. I kinda need to prepare for work tomorrow. It's not going to be pleasurable." I toss the apple core in the trash and the spoon in the sink.

"You don't have to go in. Why not take the day off?"

"And, have people talking about me behind my back? To let Charles have another day to spin a web of lies? I don't think so. I am so gonna own this. Plus, my friends will have my back. I can count on them."

"Well, in order to prepare for tomorrow, I say that we should watch Zac Efron movies until we can't handle any more and gorge on M&M, Sweetarts, and Strawberry-Kiwi Snapple."

"Sounds great." While Logan and I have our bad spots, we really know each other better than any one else. I hug him from behind then go off to gather my hair curlers and Zefron movies. He comes into my room with snacks.

"How did I know HSM would be first?"

"Because, we need to duet. We just need to let loose." I take the Sweetarts.

"Of course. Of course."

Yes, we do enjoy our duets and even the second movie too, then we move to Hairspray. I get so distracted that it takes all three movies to get my curlers in. As the night passes, we tire and switch to Lord of the Rings. Making commentary scarcely, but there is something that has been on my mind.

"Hey, Logan."

"Hmm?" He is nearly asleep.

"Has mom or dad talked to you about me?"

"Yeah. Mom asked if you were okay."

"That it?"

"She asked if you were eating right and stuff." His body is desperately trying to shut down.

"Thanks. Go to bed. Get some sleep." I push at his shoulder and he groans until he's up and off the bed. He leaves and so does my consciousness.

_**/Next Morning/**  
_

Oh my-. Ugh. I've just sat up and feel nauseated.

"Uh." I hold my head. Not throwing up this morning would be great. Terrific, really.

"Logan." I call out.

"Logan."

"You awake?" I hold my stomach and get out of bed. On the bathroom door, there's a note. I pull it off.

"Went to the studio early today. See you tonight, Bug." Well, I guess that answers my question. I sit on the edge of the tub, waiting to grab the toilet bowl and yack. I don't know which I prefer, not throwing up and feeling nauseated or throwing up and getting it over with.

I moan and finally give up, having to get to work. Pants, shirt, hair, teeth, make-up, and shoes. The daily routine, but a bit slower seeing as I'm not supposed to have caffeine. _No coffee. _How does one go about life without coffee? Miserably, that's how.

You know the routine. Get in the car, turn the music on, get to work, avoid everyone. Today, that probably wouldn't be possible. In the bench area, a herd of shouting and excited teens and slightly older folks buzz.

_"Wow! Look! She's here!"_

_"How can she even show her face?"_

_"Make room! Big Mama coming through!" _An uproar of laughter.

_"Is she really showing?"_

"Girls, quickly. Grab your guys. She may take them as her own." Charles mocks me in the midst of them. I glare over at him.

"Well, at least they couldn't get her pregnant. Someone already did that!" Eric fist bumps Charles. How can he be so cruel? He is partially responsible for this baby too. It wasn't an immaculate conception.

"Oh, no! Someone! Call an ambulance! My water broke!" Claire pours her water bottle over into the plant, making another wave of hysterical laughter. I hold my upper arms and continue to walk.

_"What not gonna stand up for yourself?" _

_"Too chicken?"_

_"Emotions already getting the best of you?"_

"She can keep her mouth shut. That's not the problem." If he makes one more smart comment, I probably wouldn't be able to keep my tears in. I settle into the store, try to busy myself, but they are so loud. I wish opening time would come so they would get lost.

_"I wanna know who get her do that. She's always been so strict."_

_"Whoever it was apparently wasn't that smart. I mean, she did end up with a kid." _

_"She gonna end up with his paychecks!"_

"She most definitely is not." Charles inserts.

_"Why do you say that?"_

"Who knows if she even knows who the father is."

_"Oh, Bro. I couldn't imagine being in your position. It must be so hard."_

_"How did she break it to you? What happened?"_

_"Were you upset?"_

"I never knew that I could hurt so badly. I was so good to her." A few girls sigh sympathetically. My eyes roll.

I make my way through work. James texts me on my break. Have to manage a few returns and frustrating coupon situations. Nothing interesting really happens worth mentioning. Well, that is until I was walking out. If I had been in a group, I would not have noticed him. The old man sitting on the sidewalk. He had a cough that suggested possibly it has been there too long and that the mucus has settled in his chest. Suggesting; bronchitis. The clothes on his back are awfully worn out, the tiny bit of hair he has was unkempt. I have seen him before., digging in the dumpsters.

I couldn't leave him there without helping him. This is the reason I decided to become a nurse, to help the helpless. A small family walks by him as if he wasn't even there.

"Excuse me, Sir." I walk up and touch his shoulder. He jumps.

"I'm sorry. I was just resting my legs. I'm going."

"Oh. No. No. That's not what I was going to say." I smile to show I mean no harm.

"Well, then what can I do for you."

"I was gonna ask you to wait right here. Do you mind to sit right there until I return?"

"I don't understand."

"Don't leave until I get back. Wait for me. Promise?"

"Promise?" He questions, but I take it as a confirmation. I take off to my car and to the nearest drug store. I purchase a throw blanket, cough medicine, tissues, two new tee shirt, a pair of sweat pants, a pack of socks, gloves, assorted food items, a few sweet treats, a small package of bottled water, and then a backpack for it all to fit in. I'm pretty sure that the clerk thinks that I am running away.

I get to the car and repackage the items into the backpack. I drive back to where I left the homeless man. He sits there faithfully, probably scared out of his wits. If I was him, I would ditch if a crazy lady asked me to stay. After parking the car again, I approach him with the backpack. He looks me over.

"I didn't catch your name earlier." I stand a few feet away.

"Stan."

"Hi, Stan. I'm Riley."

"I still don't know what you want from me."

"I don't want anything from you. I just want to help you."

"Help me?" He asks. I extend the backpack towards him.

"Merry late Christmas." Stan just looks at me.

"It's for you. Take it." I set it by him then step back again. He unzips the pack and may have started crying. His smile is what catches my attention, then through a hole in his shirt, dog tags fall out.

"Why?"

"No reason."

"You mean, you're not scared of me?"

"I don't see why I should be."

"Everyone else is. They laugh and make fun. I'm just a freak to them."

"Me too, Stan. We're not that different."

"Are you an angel?"

"Far from it, I'm afraid."

"What other explanation is there?"

"We're both freaks. I'm a pregnant teen, whose boyfriend and the baby's father told our entire friend network that I cheated on him so that he would have to be tied down. But, that's fine. He don't deserve me." I smile.

"I don't know how to repay you."

"I didn't ask you to. I'll see you around. It's been nice to meet you, Stan."

"It has been a blessing. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you."

"No problem. Good evening." I smile and turn away, feeling a sense of well-being.

**_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~ End Of Chapter ~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_**

_Thoughts? Questions? Observations? Concerns? Constructive criticism? _

_Chapter Song: Don't Laugh At Me - Mark Wills_

_I have the chapter songs on a playlist, and in order, on this Spotify playlist. Each chapter, I'll add the new song. _

_For the web player: user/krissy_mazz/playlist/3fCnX7uuXkhis1oZIvDjyn_

_Or, if you wanna just look me up: _

_1) Username: Krissy_Mazz _

_2) Playlist: Story Of My Life_


	8. Do It All Again

*Riley POV*

Two days pass. I try to block most everyone out. Succeeding a lot of the time. Everyone is excited the New Year parties that they are invited to or throwing. Logan is taking me to Carlos' against my will. Something about how I need avoid becoming a recluse and that it will be good for me to see everyone; which probably will come down to me sitting in the corner with an iPod and _A Walk To Remember_. Not that I am that much of an introvert, but I won't know anyone there; aside from James, Carlos, Kendall, and Alexa.

Jamie and Landon occupy mind right now. Rereading _A Walk To Remember _and _The Notebook _ are monthly activities for me. Not that I'm waiting around for my Noah or Landon, I know love does not happen like in the stories. It's quite clear. Though, the idea that so much love and devotion can be anchored to one person; no matter what they do or where they go, someone is still waiting to love them. Noah waited seven years. Landon never moved on. Could anyone ever love me like that? I'm not saying that it will, but also not saying that it won't. What is a girl without her hope?

I turn on my back. Is there someone out there waiting and wondering what it's like to love me? What if my significant other is wondering where I am? Wait. What if I don't have a significant other? Will I be an old lady who only has her cats to keep her company?

"Are you getting dressed or what?" Logan knocks at my door, pulling me away from my thoughts. My eyes shift over to the door.

"Yes."

"Can you put a little pep in your step?"

"Sure thing."

"Bip bip bip." His fingers snap and I shut my book, getting up. Wearing leather jeans, floral print shirt, and tennis shoes; I grab my purse and trudge down the steps. Logan provides a mean look in my direction.

"Try to smile."

"I don't feel well."

"I'm sorry but this will make you feel better. You can dance and talk to people."

It's not even a depression thing; I don't feel sad or mad, just nauseated. Slightly irritated, but I can get over it. He's been looking forward to this; I do not what to ruin it.

Work life is feeling the way high school did, just trying to get through the day so that I can go home and forget. Liz is my only work friend, well the only one who still sees me as me. Charles gets all the pitying attention. Thankfully, he no longer is a problem of mine. The only reason he occupies any space of my mind is because I have to carry around his abandoned child. At times, I find myself in a fit of anger, resenting the little one, then I break down because it's not his or her fault. Apparently, Logan told Mom about my decision. She actually called me, didn't have much to say though.

Carlos' house has cars lined in the driveway and down the street. Joy. Logan parks and we get out, then walk to the thumping house. I have acquired Lo's hoodie and since the air is so crisp, it feels nice.

"We're gonna have fun, right?" Logan nudges me with his elbow.

"I'm gonna try."

"Yes. You will have an amazing time." The door is already open, so we walk in. People line and fill each room. He has no problem talking and locating his girlfriend and friends, but I meander farther.

"Riley! Oh there you are, Babe!" I look up to see James approaching me, leaving the girl behind him with a scowl. The look on his face explains that he is getting hit on and needed an escape.

"Aye, Boo!" I throw my arms up around his neck to pull him close. A little warm kiss is planted on my cheek, it causes cold chills to cover every inch of my body. We take a moment to exchange a silent 'Thank You' and 'You're Welcome'.

"So, Honey, how about that dance?" He pulls me by the hand, passing too many people until we find ourselves in the living room. Logan, Kendall, Bree (Logan's girlfriend), and whomever Kendall is dancing with are here too.

"Follow me." James winks and hops up on the coffee table, but I lock my feet on the ground. Having no part of this, he reaches down, pulling me up by my hips. I playfully scream and hit him on the chest.

_"Baby, when they look up at the sky, we'll be shooting stars just passing by."_

He spins me around. I smile.

_"You'll be coming home with me tonight. We'll be burning up like neon lights."_

He gives me a signal to spin. I know there no getting out of this. His eyebrow raises as he waits for me to complete his request. Instead of waiting, he hops to the beat. His arms wraps around my waist, and I have to hop to keep up with him.

_- "Let's escape into the music. DJ, let it play. I just can't refuse it. Love the way you do this. Keep on rocking to it. Please, don't stop the-. Please, don't stop the music."_

_- "We've come too far to give up who we are. So, lets raise the bar and our cups to the stars."_

_- "So, wake me up when it's all over. When I'm wiser and I'm older. All this time I was finding myself, and I didn't know I was lost."_

_- "I wanna thrill you like Michael! I wanna kiss you like Prince! Let's get it on like Marvin Gaye, like Hathaway!" _

_- "So, you wanna play with magic? Boy, you should know what you're falling for. Baby, do you dare to do this? 'Cause, I'm coming at you like a dark horse."_

_- "I know don't about you, but I'm feeling 22. Every thing will be alright if you keep me next to you."_

_- "Hey! I just met you and this is crazy! But, here's my number! So, call me maybe?!"_

_- "And, we're dancing on the edge of the Hollywood sign. I don't if I'll make it, but watch how good I'll fake it."_

_- "Every single night we fight to get a little high on life! To get a little something right, something real. At least we try time after time."_

_- "I wanna rock with you, all night. Dance you in to the sunlight."_

_- "You have taken over my days, so tonight I'm going out."_

I let go. Logan whoops at us, but Kendall joins us. This much attention has me blushing and we have too much fun to notice. I'm pretty sure that we wouldn't even notice if the house fell in around us.

The bass of the next song is thumping everything, the speakers visibly vibrating, and then you have Kendall, James, and I hopping on the coffee table, performing a mini concert. If you qualify screaming lyrics at each other a concert.

_"I got this feeling on the summer day when you were gone. I crashed my car into the bridge. I watched, I let it burn! I threw your stuff into a bag and pushed it down the stairs. I crashed my car into the bridge. I don't care! I love it! I don't care!" _Everyone is having a great time. Kendall currently has my attention, spinning me around with his hand on my waist.

I can tell you what we do not love; the moment the coffee table broken apart underneath us. I land on top of the two boys. Uncontrollable laughter is heard every where. The table in pieces around us. Choruses of laughter ring everywhere, even from me. Well, that is until my throat began to burn with acid. Oh no. I try to push off the guys' chests, Bree is reaching down to help us up; I take her arm and pull up to launch off to the bathroom. People. People everywhere. It's so packed, can't find my way.

A door opens, thankfully, to the bathroom. I make a mad dash, forcefully slamming the door shut. No need to account for the actions that happen behind the door, it's not pretty. In no way do I ever want to relive those 15 minutes.

"Riley?" The tiny knock is barely heard.

"Yeah?" I stand by the sick and rinse out my mouth.

"Can I come in?"

"Yeah."

"I brought you water." James peeks through the door. "Are you okay? I'm so sorry. Did you get hurt?"

"No. No. I'm fine. Did you?"

"No. Are you sure? Is everything okay?"

"Yes, James. I said everything is fine."

"I just wanted to make sure."

"Thank you. Some fresh air might be what's needed." I run a hand through my hair, taking the water bottle. It's funny how just a while ago, I was jumping and dancing with everyone, but now just seeing them is making me feel ill. I exit the house, followed by James. We take a seat on the front steps.

"You looked pretty great in there, Ri." I smile and lay my head against his shoulder.

"Thanks, Jamie." He lays his head on mine. Slowly and comfortably, we breathe together. That's it. We just breathe. No words needed or wanted. The music flowing from every crevice and open space of the house is more than enough.

"No! I saw you! And, guess what?! It's over, Logan!" Bree bustles by me, I scoot over to avoid being trampled.

"Breanna! Stop. Please." Logan now darts past James and I.

"No!"

"I was blind folded! It was a game!"

"You shouldn't have agreed to play!"

"I'm sorry, you're right." He pulls her arm to turn her around. She glares at him, but he just kisses her.

"You're right. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have agreed to play a game where I could potentially kiss someone else. It was stupid. I will never do that again. She wasn't even that good. I definitely enjoy kissing you more. Forgive me, Baby?" He pleads. Her lips purse in a pout.

"Yes."

"Thank you." Lo leans to kiss her again and she kisses back. The two lovers whisper apologies to each other briefly. James and I look at each other, trying to not laugh, to digest what just happened. He has moved over to rest his back against the hand rail and motions for me to join. I lay my back against his chest. This should feel wrong, but it doesn't. There doesn't seem to be any harm or bad warning signals. He talks about the stars but I don't pay much attention, too focused on his breathing chest against my back. Is it bad that I really just want to stay like this? Is he trying to just be a good friend or in his own trying to say he might want to be more? But, why would he? I'm really not 'there' for another relationship.

The house quiets down to start the countdown.

"Ten!"

"Nine!"

"Eight!"

"Seven!"

"Six!"

"Five!"

"Four!"

"Three!"

"Two!"

"ONE!"

James softly tilts my head back by placing his finger under my chin. It happens so swiftly. My neck rests on his shoulder as he places his lips on mine and I receive them with a pounding heart. My lips greet his softly as his graze mine.

_**~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~ _~_End Of Chapter ~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~**_

_Thoughts? Questions? Concerns? Observations? Constructive criticism? Ideas? Theories?_

_Let me know what you are thinking!_

_Chapter Song: Do It All Again - Big Time Rush/ Emblem3 (It's a mix between both versions.)_


	9. Not A Bad Thing

*Riley POV*

"Happy New Year, Riley." I hear him but do not process his words.

What in the world? What just happened? I touch my lips.

"James?"

"I'm sorry. I know, it seems crazy and sudden, but I'm crazy about you. Have been for a while. Kinda thought that it showed through too much sometimes." He gives a nervous chuckle.

"What? Are you nuts? James, I-I'm pregnant. I don't think you want to be with someone who is having someone else's baby."

"It doesn't matter to me. "

"This is bizarre! Are you even hearing yourself?"I stand up, standing on the bottom step.

"Yes."

"Then, you're aware that you wanna date someone in my predicament?"

"Very much so."

"You're out of your mind."

"I am."

"Only someone that is bonkers would do that!"

"I admit, I am."

"Would you quit that? I'm trying to have an intelligent conversation with you."

"You're just scared. I don't want you to be." He stands up, crossing his arms across his chest.

"Yes! I'm scared! I'm terrified. I'm having to deal with a break up and a baby that I'm not even sure what to do with! My family hates to acknowledge me! My friends turned against me-!"

"I didn't."

"James. I know that-." I sigh frustratingly. "I just wanna get through these next few months. Find the baby a home and try to act normal again. I don't want to, but it's for the best. Please. This is already so hard for me. I just need you to be there for me."

"Of course I'll be there for you. No matter what. But, we already act like a couple, sometimes even staying over at each other's house. Why not give it shot? If nothing comes of it, we can stay just friends. "

"Maybe after I have the baby."

"Why wait?"

"Because, I'm pregn-."

"Pregnant! I know! I was the one who told you! But, what if I were to step up and be the man Charles couldn't? If I could fill his shoes, would you let me? If you wanna find the baby a home, I'll help. If you wanna keep the baby, I'll help. Just let me. Let me in."

"Why do you wanna help me so badly?"

"I want you to be happy." My eyes start to fill with tears, he pulls me in to his chest. "Shh. Shh. Shh."

"Can I have a dance?" He asks. The song sounds slow enough, so I just nod in agreement, knowing he's just trying to make me feel better.

- _"Said, "All want from you is to see you tomorrow. And, every tomorrow, maybe you'll let me borrow your heart. And, is it too much to ask for every Sunday? And, while we're at it throw in every other day to start."_

"Ouch." James laughs as I step off his foot.

"I'm sorry."

"It's fine. It's fine." He nods.

"I'm sorry! I didn't compete on a dancing competition with a professional."

"I said that it's fine. It is." He twirls me slowly, his arm lingering on my waist. I sway next to him, not directly next to him but close enough to still feel his breath when he exhales. He takes notice of the gap and steps closer.

Is this wrong? Should this be happening?

_- "I know people make promises all the time, then they turn right around and break them, when someone cuts your heart open with a knife and you're bleeding. But, I could be that guy to heal it over time."_

No words can describe how much I just to ask what he's doing. I'm so confused. Charles and I have only broken up for a month. I don't understand.

"Come on." My hand in his, his other hand on my lower back.

"Just feel it. Relax." His lips touch some hair that is hanging over my ear, and I shiver; taking a step back, followed by his step, then the other feet match the pattern. His lips touch my ear this time.

"And, I won't stop until you believe it. 'Cause, Baby, you're worth it. So, don't act like it's a bad thing to fall in love with me. 'Cause you might look around and find your dreams come true with me." James sings the lyrics as if he specifically wrote them for me. He holds my body as if I am a priceless relic. A quick spin, lowering me into a dip. The song continues in the background, but the noise I can hear is my heart pounding. Faster and faster.

- "_If you fall, you always land right in these arms. These arms of mine. Don't act like it's a bad thing to fall in love with me._" He looks me in the eyes.

"Maybe we should stop spinning." I grip his shoulders. He raises me to a standing position.

"We have." I look to see our feet planted on the ground. His lips press to mine again. I don't stop him. In fact, my lips seem to have been wanting it much more than they let on. He wraps his arms around my ribs, pressing me to his body, spinning us both around. He smiles first.

"What are we gonna do?"

"Take this one day at a time. Just like normal."

"Except this isn't normal, Maslow."

"It'd be boring if it was." He smiles.

Charles has someone new, why can't I? I'm pregnant, so what? He fathered him or her. James said he doesn't care that I'm going to carry the baby. He seems persistent, he doesn't even care if I keep him or her. Could this be that bad? I do care for James, he seems to care for me.

"Pizza next Friday? And, a movie?"

"How about I see you tomorrow? We can hang out."

"Alright then. Pizza and Star Wars?"

"I'll bring the pizza and see you at five."

"I'll have the ice cream waiting."

"So," He smirks, "Is it a date?" He asks, catching me off guard causing my face to flush red.

"I guess it is."

"Good." He pulls me in a hug. We're just gonna be happy at the moment, probably work through things later. His parents call to wish him a happy new year and my brother and Bree came over to us to do the same. I thought Logan might ask as to why James' arm are draping around me, but it's really not that unfamiliar a scene. We always are laying on each other.

**_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~ End Of Chapter ~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_**

_Thoughts? Observations? Questions? Theories? Constructive criticism? Concerns?_

_Chapter song: Not A Bad Thing - Justin Timberlake_


	10. Invisibly Shaken

*Riley POV*

Around two or three in the morning I went to bed, which partially sucks because I have to be at work by 9:30. Unexpectedly, my phone buzzes with a new text.

**Mazzy: **_When you wake up, give me a call._

I smile.

Wait, what? Smile? Yes. I touch my lips to confirm then hit the call button. The dial tone lasts for only 3 rings before his gruff morning voice comes over.

"Morning, Ri."

"Morning, James."

"And, how are you today?"

"I'm doing alright. Still in bed, should be getting ready for work. How are you?"

"Same. Hahaha." This has never happened before, but when he laughs butterflies flutter in my tummy. The only explanation is for his confession last night, it put a whole new perspective on things, not a bad one either.

"So, what was the urgency?"

"Oh. I was just wanted to confirm our plans tonight."

"Nothing's changed from my end."

"Good. Good. I was wondering if I could pick you up and take you to work so that I could just pick you up too."

"Yeah. That sounds good."

"Really? Okay. I guess, I need to get up now. See you shortly."

"Can't wait." I could just see his wink.

"See ya, Mazzy."

"Bye, Ri." I press to hang up the call. A smile plasters its way across my face. Logan and Bree are giggling and making noise in the kitchen. How cute. It feels unnecessary to relay the morning routine, but thankfully, I didn't have any sickness. I style my hair much like Katniss today and wear minimal make up.

I'm starving though, and I really want ice cream. So, I pop down the steps to make my way to the kitchen.

"Good morning, Logan." I hug my brother for a brief second then continue on to open the freezer; removing the chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. Not even pretending to fool around with a bowl, only taking a spoon from the dish drainer.

"Good morning, Riley Grace." He chuckles.

"Just remember; it's not my fault." I put a silencing finger up as I eat directly from the tub.

"I didn't say it was. It's just so stereotypical that it's funny." Logan perks up when Bree enters the room again and she too looked happy about something. Watching them is like watching a married couple; several arguments, lots more love, just the way the function around each other. I see them as one of those couples that everyone is in love with and everyone is. They just are that typical, movie-like couple.

"So, I heard you on the phone with James." Bree wags her eyebrows at me.

"Oh yeah." I chuckle.

"Oh yeah? Come on. Tell me about your 'plans'." She pegs.

"Plans? What plans? You have plans?" Logan switches to big brother mode.

"James wants to pick me up for work and pick me up tonight and then come to the house and watch movies. Last night, he-."

"Last night he what?" Logan and Bree say at the same time, but with two totally different levels of excitement.

"He asked me out." Both of of their jaws dropped.

"That's so amazing, Riley!" She comes over and wraps her arms around me, squeezing me tight in a hug.

"I don't think it's such a good idea." Logan scratches the back of his head.

"What? Why not? You and I have made bets for years on how long it would take before they would get together ."

"I know, but we didn't calculate her being pregnant with someone else's baby."

"What does that have to do with anything?" My face burns red.

"She has be careful."

James' car pulls up, honking 3 times.

"I have to go." I stand up, pulling my purse over my shoulder, and leave the ice cream to bolt out the door.

_***Charles POV***_

I've folded 30 shirts already this morning, put at least 40 jackets out, and smoked 2 cigarettes. Three girls have text me but I don't bother to text back. Eric gets my attention from my phone.

"Woah, Charles. Charles. Come here." He frantically motions me towards the front of the store.

"What?"

"You're not gonna believe this." I get up and stand in the entrance; my eyes follow the way his finger is pointing. The scene before me; Riley walking this way with James right by her side and his arm draping around her shoulders.

"You think that's him?" Eric nudges me in the arm.

"Who?"

"The guy she cheated on you with. You know, the baby's daddy."

"What? No."

"What makes you so sure?"

"I-I'm not."

"Do you know something?"

"No." I watch them approach. She's smiling.

"You are handling this so well. I don't know what I'd do if I was in your situation. This can't be easy. I just can't believe that she has the guts to show up with that dude though."

"It's fine."

"How do you do it, Man? You're so strong." He clasps my shoulder and turns back in the store.

"I broke her heart first though." I whisper.

"She cheated on you." He is still standing there, over-hearing my comment.

"I broke up with her."

"Yeah. I know, because she cheated and got pregnant."

"Yeah. I guess." I watch them walk by. She's obviously using her best friend to try to get me jealous. It wouldn't have to be this way if she would just take care of the issue.

_*Later that evening*_

"Charles."

"Grams." I smile and approach her already open arms to hug her.

"How ever did you get in at this hour?" She asks as I sit in the chair next to her.

"I called Berna and told her that I had to work over, but that I wanted to come visit you. I know that you don't go to bed anyways. You're a wild one."

"That's me. So, how's my handsome grandson been?" Her hand pats my mine.

"I've been alright."

"Just alright?"

"Yes. How have you been?"

"Same old, same old. How's that darling Riley?" She asks. I sigh.

"I don't know. We broke up."

"Oh, Honey. Oh, Baby. I'm so sorry. What happened?"

"I really messed up, Grams." I lean forward and hold my head in my hands. I'm not sure that I should tell her, she already has so much to deal with, but she is the only person I do want to talk to. Her patience to deal with these predicaments and the comfort she can provide is what I need. No. What I need, and am seeking, is her advice.

"Tell me."

"I-I."

"She's pregnant."

"How'd you know?" I sit straight up and look at her.

"I didn't. But, it was rolling around my brain. Let me guess, you reacted badly? Enough to cause the break up?"

"I told our friends that she cheated on me, that the baby isn't mine. I stood by idly as the made fun of her. I told her to get an abortion."

"Charles Xaiver Evans."

"I know. I know. But, do you know what Phil would do if he found out?"

"Well, it's none of Phil's business. Did she do it?"

"No. That's why I broke up with her. And, then I tried to hang with other girls in front of her to make her jealous so that she would come back, but instead she started to bring her best guy friend around everywhere. I don't know what I'm gonna do."

"Has she said what she's gonna do with the baby?"

"She said that if I didn't wanna keep it, we could find a family. Other than that, we've not talked. I really messed up." I clench my jaw.

"You did, but that doesn't mean that you can't make it right. Tell your friends and parents the truth."

"Grams, I don't want the baby. I can't be responsible for something like that. I'm not ready for that. I just want her to understand that."

"Well, if you weren't ready for a baby, then you should have left your pants up."

"Grams."

"I'm serious. You are every bit as guilty as her, but she's the one who is being responsible."

"I don't know what to do."

"Apologize."

"I don't know how."

"Well, then. Live with what you've done."

"I might have to."My phones buzzes with a text from my mom. She's asking where I am. I send her one back telling her where and that I'll be heading out soon. I don't care much for my step dad, but if I dare defy the rules, he'll take it out on me or mom.

"I have to go; that was mom. Wondering where I am."

"Alright, Sweetheart. I'm sorry to hear about your girlfriend, but things will work out for the better. They always do."

"Love you, Grammy." I lean over to hug her tightly without squeezing her.

"I love you too, Charles."

"I'll be back to see you soon."

"I know you will." She pulls out of the hug and gives my cheek a quick kiss. I smile at her and depart. The parking lot of the nursing home always made me sick, thinking that sometimes people come here once and they never return.

I can't wait until I get enough money saved so that I can get out of that house. As soon as I save the money, I have to give to Phil and mom to pay for something or another, my car messes up, or another natural disaster happens.

I wonder if she misses me or if she's really moved on.

_***Riley POV***_

"You are such a nerd and your little glasses just make it more adorable." I smile.

"You can be a jerk sometimes. You know that." He raises his eyebrows and does a sarcastic nod, tossing a piece of popcorn at me. I catch it in my mouth.

"I know, but you love me." We laugh but it kinda feels weird now. 'Love' possibly means a different kind now. Of course we still love each other in a best friend forever kind of way, could we possibly actually be in love eventually.

Wow. It's way too early to even be entertaining those thoughts. Is it though? He said he doesn't care if I keep the baby; does that mean that he would want to raise him or her with me?

Stop. Just stop. That will come later.

**_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~ _~_~_~End Of Chapter ~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_**

_Thoughts? Concerns? Questions? Theories? Constructive criticism? Observations?_

_Chapter Song: Invisibly Shaken - Rodney Atkins (for Charles' POV)_


	11. Play It Again

*Riley POV*

"School starts tomorrow." I moan as I look at the calendar on the wall.

"School will be good for you. A good thing to take up all your time and steal your mind away from things." Liz states and leans against a stack of boxes waiting to be opened.

"You're right, but that doesn't mean that I wanna."

"Yeah. But, you do wanna see your friends again."

"I guess." I respond to James' text then look up.

"Hmm. So, James? Are you two like a thing?"

"What makes you say that?" I arch an eyebrow and she looks at me as if I'm stupid.

"He brings you to work and picks you up, every time your phone lights up it's with a message from him, and he clings on you like static. You don't even realize it. Omg! Are you friendzoning him?"

"Uh. No. Haha. In fact, to celebrate my last night of freedom, we're going to one last party. His friends or family, or both. Anyways. He thinks it's a good way to 'announce' that we're together."

"How do you feel about it? Please, tell me that you're not just toying with this boy so that you can get back at Charles."

"Of course not. I'm not that cruel."

"I was about to flip out." There's a brief silence. I can see a question swimming in her eyes.

"What is it?"

"I'm not trying to be rude, but does he know about the baby?" She looks at me but my eyes are looking at my abdomen in the mirror near us, then I turn to face her.

"He knew before me." I clear my throat. "He's the one who read my pregnancy test. I was too scared."

"Awh. How sweet. Do you think anything will come of this?"

"Seeing as we're entering the relationship with major complications, I'm not sure."

"But, you've also had a long friendship."

"This is true."

"This is all so sweet and whimsical! Like a Nicholas Sparks' story!" She winks.

"Oh. Haha." I sarcastically laugh. It's no secret who my favorite author is. As previously stated, I may be in love with the stories, but I also know that they are just stories. That kind of thing doesn't happen that frequently, though an extraordinary few do experience it.

"Guess who" Two hands cover my eyes.

"Adam Levine?" I call out.

"Nope."

"Chris Hemsworth?"

"No."

"Ohhh, James!"

"Yes!" He removes his hands and I turn around to face him. Liz gives me an 'I told you so' look before stepping to another part of the store to lend us some privacy.

"You look nice." He does. Denim jeans, tee shirt, and worn out converses.

"While you do good in uniform, I have the clothes you asked me to hold onto so that you could change." A smile dazzles across his face as he holds out my Breakfast At Tiffany's themed purse that has my post-work clothes inside.

"Thank you." I take it from him. "I just have a few minutes then I can clock out."

"Oh, are you gonna get in trouble? Do I need to wait outside?"

"Not if I'm assisting you." I gesture at the endless lingerie.

"Well, I am looking for something a little special." His eyes glance over different colored variations of the same nightwear then laughs, shaking his head. "How do women even get in some of these?"

"I sell it, not wear it." I say.

"A shame really. I guess, if you did you'd need a really good best friend to help you into it before your... lover got home." He hesitated.

"Unless you just got a normal nightgown or perhaps some sweatpants."

"Good point. Do you often have to help clueless men?"

"Every day and, on occasion, clueless women. And, I will be right back." I take off to the register to assist a pack of middle aged women buying panties, lotion, and perfume. After that I hold a finger up to James to signal him to wait until I clock out. In a jiffy, I'm back out to him, with my purse and clothes in hand. He puts his arm around my shoulder as we walk out, telling me about his day and then I tell him about mine. We stop by the bathroom so that I can change.

"Ahh. This feels so much better." I tug my hair into a ponytail.

"You seem to be in a good mood." He states as he opens the passenger door for me and leans on the outside of it, I lean on the inside part, our faces just inches apart. Smiles grazing both of us.

"I am." I drop down into the car, then he shuts the door. Shortly after, he's in the driver's side, starting the car, and pulling out of the parking lot.

"Well, that's great to hear. I'm glad. You hungry?"

"A little."

"Good. Tonight will be fun. The last fun like this that we're gonna have until April." He sarcastically rolls his eyes.

"Let's make it count then. Have all the fun that is to be offered."

_*James POV*_

She just chitter-chatters on. It's so hard to make conversation when she's taking my breath away. I avert my eyes from the road for a second to see her scan through the radio.

_- "I love you. And, I need you. Nelly, I love you. I do need you. No matter what I do, all I think about is you. Even when I'm with my Buu. Boy, you know I'm crazy over you. No matter what I do, all I think about is you. Even when I'm with my Buu. Boy, you know I'm crazy over you." (Dilemma - Nelly ft. Kelly Rowland)_

"This song is so old!" That didn't stop her from singing right along to it.

"I know. How does anyone even remember this song exists?"

"Because, - no matter what I do; all I think about is you." She sings and shares a full smile with a fit of laughter following. Today seems like an 'up' day for her. She's been stuck in the rut that Charles left her in, but not today. Once again, she scans through the radio.

_- "Well, I love a rainy night. I love a rainy night. I love to hear the thunder, watch the lightening when it lights up the sky. __You know it makes me feel good._" (I Love A Rainy Night - Eddie Rabbit)

"Oh my gosh! This is my song!"

"I know. You've liked this song for the longest time." I turn the volume up and roll down the windows. Her favorite feeling.

"Yes! Can you remember all the words?!"

"I dunno! Let's see."

_- "Well, I love a rainy night. Such a beautiful sight. I love to feel the rain on my face, taste the rain on my lips.; in the moonlight's shadow." _

"Showers wash all my cares away, and I wake up to a sunny day! 'Cause I love a rainy night!" She might not sing completely on key, but it doesn't matter. We reach my dad's house, park, and about cut the car off, but she stopped me. In the two seconds it took, she is out of the car and pulling my door open.

"I wanna dance!" She says. I flick the volume louder and she takes my hand. No pleading needed, the smile that her face bares gives me so choice. Sort of funny how that works. I twirl her around before pulling her close.

The song comes to an end shortly; I cut the car off and turn back to Riley. I watch her bounce up to the front door and knock. That girl is something else. Dad opens the door and they hug in greeting, then they both wave their hands at me to hurry up.

"I'm coming. I'm coming."

The house is lightly decorated with people; a few members of the family and some friends. I take Riley's hand, but it's her who intertwines our fingers. Sure we've held hands before, but not like this.

Right off the bat; Philip, Carlos, Kendall, Dustin, Ali, and her baby Emma are here. I'm sure Logan and Bree are on their way or coming later. We make our way around the people.

"Why don't you head back here and get you two something to eat." Dad calls from the sliding glass door and leads to the back deck. I look at her to see what her say is; she nods and bites her lip.

"You okay?"

"Yeah."

"Sure?"

"Yes. But, what if I get sick from the smell?" She whispers that last part.

"Do you wanna wait in here? Or do you not wanna eat at all?" I turn to her, rubbing my thumbs on her forearms.

"Maybe, you can see if it's really potent. Like, see if the smell is really strong."

"Okay. I will." My hands slide down her arms and over her hands. I make small talk with Dad while checking 'the coast'. Once I deem the air trustworthy of not being sickening, I nod.

"There you are. How are you, Hun?" Dad asks of Riley as she slides in beside me. I wrap my arm around her shoulders.

"I'm doing fine. This boy keeps me sane." Her hand lightly presses to my chest and the warmth of her palm is felt through my shirt.

"James is good at that. He is always one for a charity case." Dad winks and nudges her with his elbows.

Why, Dad, why? All of the possible descriptions that you could use, charity case? She probably is thinking the worst things of me now.

"You're right, he is." Ri smiles.

"Well, I'm not meaning to starve you. You two just go ahead and eat. I'm gonna go make sure nothing of mine is broke." They swap pleasantries until he actually departs.

For a moment we just stand there. Then, the elongated sigh and crossing of her arms tipped me off that she had something on her mind. She picks up a cup of tea then takes a seat on one of the lawn chairs by the table. I'm not sure what the thought is, if it's not about what my dad said, then I don't wanna bring it up. Both in thought, we have silence.

"A charity case? Is that what I am?" Her finger taps at the lip of the cup.

"No. No, not at all." I squat down in front of her, cupping my hands around the back of her knees and rubbing my thumbs over the top.

"Does he think you're just with me so I didn't get an abortion?"

"He doesn't even know about the baby. He knows that I'm with you because I care about you. I'm not with you so you didn't get an abortion. I'm with you, because I waited." I set the cup on the table, take both her hands in mine; holding onto them. "He just had a poor choice of words. You know me better than that, and you know that you are more than that to me. "

"But, what about the baby? What if you realize that you don't wanna be with me because you don't wanna deal with the mood swings and someone else's child? What if it gets to be too much for you?"

"Riley, Baby. Stop. Stop. You're working yourself up." I cup both sides of her face.

"I'm scared, James."

"I know. It's scary, but it's gonna be okay. Even if something does happen, I won't stop being your friend. You are gonna be fine. We're gonna be fine. I promise. It's okay to be scared, I'll be there to help you." I raise up a little to wrap my arms around her and she returns the favor.

"Thank you."

"Of course." We lean back out of the hug.

"Did you call me 'Baby'?" She smiles.

"I guess I did." I blush.

"I like the way it sounds." She bites her lip. I move to sit in the chair next to her. We spend most of the evening talking to Dad, who joined us a little while later. Then, Ali comes out carrying Emma. They sit on the other side of Riley. I watch her study the mother and daughter.

I wonder if she's considering keeping her baby.

"Can I see my niece?" I ask with outstretched arms. Ali passes Emma over to me. I set the infant on my lap, bouncing my leg a little.

"Well, here's Uncle James' girlfriend." I turn the little girl to face Riley. "Well, what do you think about her? Quite a catch, right?"

"You're crazy." Riley shakes her head, trying to hide her smile.

"I am." Emma scrunches her nose and smiles, patting her hands on my face.

_*Later on that evening, when James is taking Riley home*_

"You're right. Tonight was so fun."

"I told ya." I hit the 'seek' button on the radio, hoping that we could hear that song just one more time. It would a nice end to the night. Seeing as we are pulling into her driveway, it seems like that isn't gonna happen. So, I stop scanning.

But, the odds are in my favor, because the next song to come on is it. You should see her eyes light up.

_- "Well, I love a rainy night."_

"I can't believe that it actually came back on!"

"Let's dance." I get out the car and go to open her door, I take her hand. She smiles as I lead her to the front of the car. We spin softly in the headlights. This time, it's a slower dance. She still can not slow dance worth a flip, so instead, I hold her and sway.

All good things must come to an end, but I would give the DJ anything to play it again.

I spin her one last time, she stops when she faces me. Her arms wrap around my neck and the space that's between us disappears.

She's kisses me and I kiss her back, then she leans her forehead against mine.

"Let me get you in." I take her hand for the last time tonight. We walk to the door.

"Good night, James. "

"Good night, Riley." She pushes on her tip toes, kisses my cheek, and enters the house.

_**~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~ End Of Chapter ~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~**_

_Thoughts? Questions? Concerns? Observations? Constrictive criticism? _

_Chapter Song: Play It Again - Luke Bryan_


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